Experience

“Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.” (Will Rogers ).

Experience is going through a number of choices and seeing those choices to their consequences. After awhile your choices (or judgments) are no longer choices but your way of life, experiences telling you the right way to live. At about age 40, I realized that not every person in American can make a million dollars by the time they are 30 and when I let that foolish notion go, that was when I realized the true nature of humanity. I know now what to do with my life and it’s quite a bit different than when I was a child or a young adult. I choose to let go of the notion that I must make the most amount of money possible and instead try to share what I have with others who can benefit from it.

I fully believe that humanity became fittest and smartest in the circle of life by sharing the work with all tribal members as best as each task fit each member and by sharing the food with all tribal members equally. Humanity continued to progress and became the true keepers of the planet by following this plan. Anthropologists document this and I think if one looks deep inside one’s own heart, that truth feels right.

It’s when we started the “every man for himself” attitudes, when we got the “he who has the most gold wins” attitude that we started to fall apart. I suddenly noticed that quite a few people at the top were amassing great fortunes but were not giving back in kind to their fellow humans. They were “dying with the most toys” but that is not winning. We all know they can’t take those toys with them. I suddenly realize there is no important reason to make a million dollars by the time you are 30.

For me at this time, I need to let go of things that no longer matter. It is not even a question of needing to let go, it comes as naturally as breathing. I no longer set a goal for a new car, just a car that runs and is efficient on mileage (after all we all have to do our part to reduce our dependency on oil). This helps reduce the number of cars that are sent to the junk yards. I no longer set a goal on owning the latest fashions instead I shop at a Goodwill retail store. This helps reduce the amount of cast off clothing that winds up in the dumps. When I need to do repairs on my house, I go to the Habitat for Humanity Re-Store. Habitat for Humanity is an organization that helps the less fortunate own their own homes. They work with donated materials. The leftover (and other) donated materials are then sold at the “re-store”. There I can find extremely affordable household repair resources, such as molding for my walls, or carpet pieces to turn into rugs; leftovers from other completed construction of homes. It’s not all about saving money it’s also about respecting earth. It’s about not leaving behind a mess for my children to clean up.

When I see a person, who needs another 6 cents to pay for their groceries, I step up and pay it. When I know a person has looked for a job for 2 and half years and still has not found one, I don’t judge them I just help them as best as I can. I offer rides to job fairs or if I’m available will give rides to those who need to make it to a job interview. I donate some of my career clothing so that others can also look professional at interviews.

I don’t look at people and wonder how much money they have in their bank accounts when I see how they are dressed, or where they work. I just don’t care – that is not what is important. It’s not about whether a person is better or worse than me, it’s about being the best person I can be without checking to see if anyone is watching me.

In other words, I think the gifts I have to offer are simply; use less and only take what I need. Help, pitch in, whenever I can without questioning the other person’s motives or my own motives. I have discovered it is about conquest, all right, but not conquering a mountain of money, rather conquering the need to win. It’s about taking only what you need and giving when others need. I win when I give it away and not when I take it all. To quote once again, “Live simply that others may simply live.” (Mahatma Gandhi). This style of living has become what I want to do with my life.